Sunday, January 2, 2011

Oh so you're married now?

Roger and I had a thing a few years back. I was too naive to know that he was merely  sewing his wild oats and not looking for anything serious. He went away to Afghanistan for work on a 5-year contract and hardly heard from him since.

During the course of the year, he messaged me through Facebook when he would see me online, but we hardly talked about anything interesting. He did however begin to act quite differently.

He brought up "our past"- which I had long ago filed into my "do-not-ever-revisit" folder which had worked out quite effectively.

At one point, Roger asked me to marry him, and I deduced it to be run of the mill shit talk. I blamed it on being so far away, alone, in a desert with no female in sight and only an internet connection to the outside world. It was natural for him to fall on me, a backup from years before.

While on my trip to Chile in late November, Roger messaged me once more.

It didn't affect me in any way. If anything, I was surprised he thought that I was still the same gullible girl as before, who was more than willing to eat it all up. He told me he was coming back to Houston for a visit in late December, to which I took as an invitation to hang out.

Boy was I wrong....

On the night of Shannon's going-away dinner, we went to a popular Mexican restaurant which I'd frequented years before with Roger and the gang, when we all hung out as a group. As I was paying for my drink, I look up at the other side of the counter and see him, along with two of our other acquaintances (a couple).

I try shouting out for him, but the noise in the bar is so much that he can't hear me calling him. I get my cell phone out to call him, but get his voicemail right away. When I look up, he finally sees me and a stare of shock/surprise comes up on his face. I try to wave him over to say hi, but he ignores it completely and tells me to come over instead. I make my way over, hug him and say hello to the other couple. The guy looks surprised as well and articulates clearly "This is Mrs. West, Roger's wife" and points to the woman behind me with a warning look.

"Wife?? Oh my gosh, congratulations!!" I tell her excitedly as I give her a welcome hug and introduce myself.

I turn around to look at Roger and give him a raised eyebrow and mouth "wife??" as he nervously looks away.

"When did you get married?" I ask

"5 days ago" she answers.

"Wooow. This is great!" I tell her.

I continue catching up with the other couple until our table is ready for dinner and I separate myself from them. I fill my friends in on the ordeal and tell them what had happened previously to which they say "%#@$ him."

At the end of our dinner, I decide to head over to say bye and feel someone grab me by the waist. I turn around, thinking that it was my gay friend, and come face to face with Roger who gives me a hug.

"So how you been?" he asks.

"You're married now? So was this before or after you proposed to me?" I ask him.

"Uuh....." he says as I trail off to find his friends.

I didn't care that he was married; if you ask me, he was duping everyone. What pissed me off was that he could be such an asshole. I know it's silly to think about it, and it was obvious that it wasn't actually real, but I can't help but think how many other girls he fed the same story to. I knew he hadn't changed, and I knew to keep my guard up- and for good reason obviously. He just wanted to get married. Didn't matter to who really.

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