Thursday, December 31, 2009

2009- The year in review

I always try to do a little recap (on myspace) about what has happened during the year as it comes to a close. Most of the time, I just pull out memorable moments shared with family and friends, quotes and events. I always try to look at it in a positive light and laugh about any of the blunders I faced, telling myself I'll do better the next year.

2009 for me was........ exciting. But the word "exciting" doesn't explain it justly. It was AMAZING, NEW, FULFILLING, ACCOMPLISHED AND BEAUTIFUL.

Even though I am a depressed individual (and I attribute this to moving out of California and ending a 4 year relationship with my boyfriend) as I summarize 2009, I conclude it as f-kn awesome.


 No- it didn't happen this year, but I had a lot of fun meeting new guys. I decided to buckle down and consider online dating in January which went poorly--> to good --> to exciting --> to awful--> and to relaxed. I met 6 guys- 4 of which were incredible, well..... the ones I made out with anyway.

I dated James for about 3 weeks in January. To this day, I still consider our first date as the best I've ever had with anyone. However, he decided he was only looking at dating- not a relationship. Faced with rejection once more, I took it extremely hard and cried about it for almost a week. (Pitiful, I know now.)

I met Sebastian in March, a fresh divorcé, and we were a couple all the way until July. He broke up with me stating he wasn't ready for a real relationship, and didn't see us for long term. As of press time, we are together again, and I can't help but wonder why and if his opinions on us have changed at all. I tend to not want to get into conversations regarding the future, and just enjoy the moment.

I went on 3 dates with Gorgeous Guy after Sebastian and I broke up. Even though he was extremely nice, well established and incredibly hot (I still drool when I see his pictures on Facebook) I didn't feel sparks. He was a party animal and too accomplished for me (PhD in Engineering) We didn't have anything to connect with, other than travelling.

I met BEG shortly after and tried my hardest to move on from Sebastian. We dated for 2 months while I selfishly continued in an open relationship with Sebastian- which I kept secret from both guys.  When it became apparent that BEG had HPV and oral herpes, I freaked out and slowly started distancing myself, but continued to date him on the side.


I went to NYC for Easter Break, and even though we got a lot of rain the first day, I was excited about going to the Big Apple for the first time.

I also got to visit San Antonio with my family and see the famous Alamo.


Embarked on a 12-day journey to Europe

I went to California for Christmas break with my family. I returned to Houston to spend New Year's with Sebastian.

~Events and Adventures~

Went to the Houston Rodeo, and experienced it for the first time. It was great!!

I graduated from College. Highest Honor Graduate :)


I became a naturalized American citizen. (Photo of the Oath Ceremony)

Went to 2 great concerts by Benny Benassi and David Guetta.
(I'll completely forget about Paul Van Dyk forever cause he sucked)

Went to a very magical night of Disney on Ice

My grandma came to visit us from France for 3 months.

I conclude 2009 with an A. I hope 2010 can continue to be just as exciting.

Happy New Year Everyone!

Saturday, December 26, 2009

May-December Romance

When I was much younger- between 18-20, and managing my dad’s auto repair shop, I had an oil service rep, Chris, stop by my work and chat it up with me. At the time, I was completely naive, and never thought he was actually flirting with me, and I was too nice and respectful to cut our conversations short, so he probably thought I was flirting back.

He was really nice to me, and always stopped to say hello even if I didn't buy any supplies from him. It wasn't until years later that I called him again out of the blue to say hi (and while living out of state.) This guy is.... if I can remember correctly... almost 20 years older than me. Not a bad looking guy- British with a slight accent, blue eyes and golden hair. He had such a great smile. But he was too old for me, and I never thought about dating him.

During our phone call he said "So was this the first time I crossed your mind?"

I was shocked. I felt uneasy at the time and tried to bs my way out of it, but he kept pushing and asked “Well, let me ask you something....... do you think that maybe the thought of you and someone older, someone like me- considering our age difference- has ever crossed your mind?"

All too quickly, our past conversations came back into view, and I could remember him telling me that he had only ever dated younger women "they seem to like the stability I can offer" he said. Chris admitted he was attracted to me and would have asked me out on a date if I wasn't already with my boyfriend.

I told Chris I only wanted to date within my age group, or at most times tend to lean to younger because I still felt like a kid at heart. “Older men intimidate me. I've never thought about it" I told him.

And then he said "Well….. you never know. To tell you the truth, I think you are a very mature young lady and very attractive. I don’t remember most people, but something about you stuck in my mind. I was actually just thinking about you a couple of weeks ago and wondering what was going on in your life. And I always thought that the fellow you were dating was a really lucky guy.”

He suggested we exchange emails and I send him a picture. All of my guy friends were against it, and I never sent him one. I was just too embarrassed, and I didn’t want to start anything I knew wouldn’t lead anywhere. He asked if I was coming back to Cali anytime soon, and if I did, to get together and have lunch or dinner. He wanted to keep in touch and asked “Do you mind if I call you?"

I paused and blurted out "I'm really busy. The only reason why I called now was because I had free time.”

One thing that stuck to my mind was when he said "If you ever need help with airfare, let me know. I'd be glad to help…."

I didn't have the balls to call him back ever, but I often catch myself thinking about him. Sometimes, I want to pick up the phone and explain why I never called him back, but I chicken out every time. Now, I can see it, and I admit NOW, at 25 years old, that yes I was very flattered. It's true. He was charming and I'm pretty sure he would have been great to date, but I could never get past the 20 year age difference. I'm pretty sure my family and friends would have been against it also.

However,  I want that for my future. I want a man who can provide and I want security. I didn't have that with my last boyfriend of 4 years. I was mainly having fun, but I want a real man this time around.

Friday, December 25, 2009

The Apology

All throughout High School, I had a crush on 2 guys: Erick and Daniel. With the help of myspace, I was able to reconnect with them a few years later. I moved out of California and did the whole pen pal thing with Erick for about a year while I was away in France. I'm talking about the real pen pal deal here- paper, pen and postage. The following year, I went to California for the easter weekend and we went to a party with my friends. Nothing happened. We were just friends, and I had grown out of the silly crush a long time ago. He was apparently interested in my best friend. They did get together, but it didn't lead anywhere.

Daniel, had a thing going for me as well, but we never dated. I managed to makeout with him just a couple of times at school while I had a boyfriend (from another school) and kept it secret for years. We used to have steamy conversations online, very much like the ones BEG and I share today. When we graduated, we started talking again, and one weekend while my parents were away, I invited him over. This resulted in us having sex, which I thought could actually lead somewhere. I liked him, and he liked me, right?
Wrong. I had been the victim of a one night stand.

I tried to wait for him at work as he got off, but he just seemed so cold. We kissed, but it didn't mean anything to him. Soon after, I began dating someone, and for 4 years put him aside and slowly forgot about him.

I can't remember how exactly we got into contact again in the following years, but our conversations were always trite. We never really had anything to share, so we didn't communicate much. I never saw him after that one night, and I didn't mind it anymore.

A few years later, I found out he had had a daughter with a girlfriend, but were no longer together. I congratulated him and told him I was very happy for his new life. Some time later, I received this message from him:

Hey ,
I was on your page and I was reading your blogs and got to the point about your morals and mistakes and heartbreaks and what not and I began to think and I realized that I was a real jerk to you Ren and you didn’t deserve it. You were nice and real cool to me and I was an ass and I’m sorry. I know that it’s been many years and my apology probably doesn’t mean much to you considering that we aren’t really friends anymore but I’m hoping that this letter might change that . I would really like to be really good friends with you again and catch up on all your experiences with you and then see what happened. Well I hope I get something back if not I understand once again I’m sorry for the way I acted but I was young and naive please forgive me.

His letter caught me by surprise and I felt like he had done enough to merit a response so I wrote back :

Hey Danny,

It’s very thoughtful of you to come around so many years later. Personally, I had dismissed it and put whatever happened to rest. I can understand what happened was probably just a rebel stage that you went through.... I know- boys will be boys, and I understand that more than ever now. At this time, it was more of a forgive and forget ordeal. I don’t hold any grudges against you- I’ve moved on.
Thanks a lot for your apology though. It did mean a great deal. Hit me up whenever you're in need of a conversation!

We exchanged a few emails back and forth talking about our current situations, families and work. But afterwards, the emails went unanswered, so I left it aside again.
Every so often, he'll write or post a comment to see how I'm doing, but I don't get excited or giddy as I did when I was that 17 year-old gullible girl. I figure it's his way of seeing if I'm still interested in him and if we can maybe "get together" as he had mentioned he could pay for my ticket to Cali if I ever wanted to get back.

Hmmm...... yeah, no thanks.

Thursday, December 24, 2009

10 years ago today......

....... my twin sisters were born.  Where has the time gone? It really doesn't feel like ten years at all. And ten years ago, our entire lives changed.

The first time my mother told me she was pregnant, I cried. I was scared, angry and jealous. A part of me felt rejected. I was 13 going on 14 at the time. I told her I would feel indifferent to a new sibling because I only had half brothers who were not around at the time and had been raised as an only child for most of my life. I couldn’t imagine sharing my life with a new child as a teen.

Unfortunately, my mother had what you call a “blighted ovum type of pregnancy” where there is no fetus in the sac. I remember feeling relieved and thinking she wouldn’t try again. I was quickly set straight when she said she would try one more time before she turned 40 the next year. I silently wished she wouldn’t get pregnant again. In August of 1999, she announced she was pregnant, as I hoped the same thing would happen again. I went with her to her first ultrasound and remember feeling very excited. It wasn’t until the nurse asked “Did you know you’re carrying twins?” that both mine and my mom’s jaws dropped.

What? Twins? No way. Please let it be true! That’d be so cool!

And it was. Fraternal twin girls.

On December 21, there was a bad storm in our town which left a big mess in our yard; branches, seeds and leaves lay everywhere. My grandmother had arrived just a few days before from France and was going to stay with us for the winter to be present for the girls’ birth in late January of 2000. By then, I was 15. My mother had been ordered into bed rest, but feeling anal about cleanup, wanted to clear out the debris. My grandmother helped as well, and I remember laughing and joking with them during the cleanup. I remember my dad being very angry with me and telling me that if anything happened to my mother or the twins before their due date, that he would hold me solely responsible for it. (My dad is a very stern person. Someday I’ll blog about him)

December 23rd, the rest of my family came to our house to spend Christmas with us. On the morning of December 24th, my dad comes into my room where my grandma and I are sleeping to tell us that they are taking my mom to the hospital because her water broke. I was still half asleep but as soon as I heard “Hospital. Water. Broke.” I jolted up. The first thought that came to mind was “Oh shit. I’m responsible for this. My dad’s gonna kill me. Please don’t let anything go wrong.”

I stayed home with my cousins and grandma until my uncle came to pick us up to go to the hospital. At 12:16 pm and 12:18 pm, Diane and Désirée were born. (My mother and I had picked out the names.) They were 5 weeks premature and very tiny. The skin hung from their legs like old wrinkly ladies, and they were so hairy. They were kept in incubators for 4-5 days until my mom was released from the hospital.

At times, my life becomes more challenging and difficult, but I don’t regret at all that they were born- without them, the house would be a lot quieter, and my parents might not even be together anymore. During inopportune times, I blame my parents for the decisions they made and continue to make as they have affected all of us in some way throughout the recent years. Someday I'll explain what I mean about all of this. Sometimes I wish I would have been more active in their toddler years, but am happy when I see them after a few days away from home. They can always make me laugh, and I look forward to the following years.

What were you doing ten years ago today?
Comment and link up.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Casual dating?

In the 9 months that Sebastian and I have been "together," he has managed to meet just about everyone close to me. He has met my parents and sisters, my coworkers, my two groups of Houstonian friends, my grandmother who lives in France, my brother and friends in France, as well as a friend from California.

What have I met of his? Just one coworker while we were in an open relationship.

At first, I found it rather amusing that he had managed to meet just about everyone who was important to me- including people who live in other countries (only because we were vacationing) but then I started thinking why I hadn't met people from his group.

We talked about it and he admitted that he didn't have many friends here in Houston, that most of his friends were in California, and he didn't hang out with people outside of work. I playfully asked him if he was keeping me under wraps and he said that he was just a homebody/hermit. If he wasn't with me, he'd stay at home couped up on the internet, or sketching.

No, I don't think so. You'd be dating someone else.

He reassured me that I'd get to meet some of his friends for New Year's as we'd be spending it with them.

In the meantime, I couldn't get past the idea that he wasn't into monogamy forever. He didn't see relationships past 5 years as he'd get bored with them, didn't believe in marriage after his failed one, but didn't want to dismiss it altogether.

"At this time, I'm just living in the moment. I'm having fun with you, spending time with you, doing new things and going to new places with you." he said.

"It seems as if I'm wasting my time then"  I quipped.

"I wouldn't blame you if you wanted to end things now" he said.

"Your argument sounds like a paradox. You say you don't believe in long term, but won't dismiss it. It's like you don't know what you want" I remarked

"I think you know exactly what I mean. I couldn't have said it better myself" he responded. "I just don't believe two humans are meant to be together forever; I don't know; maybe. Humans are meant to procreate; that's our sole purpose. If a child comes from that relationship, then marriage should be the next step."

"So you only believe in marriage if there's a kid involved?" I asked

"Yes," he said

"So in your opinion, the marriage is for the kid, not for the adults?" I asked

"Yes. It's to protect them." He answered

So I know what I'm walking into. I was told from the beginning. "Let's just live it and let us be happy with each other's company."

What's strange is that a long time agoI too thought like this. I didn't believe in marriage. I knew that if I got married to the last one, I'd divorce. I didn't believe I could stay with just one person forever. Maybe it was because I was young and didn't believe much in "what the future holds," but now that I'm actually hearing it from someone's mouth, it....... upsets me. It makes me feel like I'm not important to that person. I'm not worth it. Can I hold it against him for being realistic?

On the other hand, I can't help but feel that this is his way of toying with me; of giving me false hopes. I never thought I'd meet the guy I read about in magazines who's afraid of committing and settling down. I always thought I'd meet someone, and we'd agree on the same future. I guess as you get older, you tend to take things more casually because you have more experiences and want to protect yourselves. Until then, I can't bring my walls down- not unless he does first. I don't want to be hurt again, and that sucks, cause there's so much compassion I'd like to share, but believe he doesn't deserve because of the way he says he feels. I sure as hell hope I don't become a husband fluffer.

What do you think?

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

He's the victim of vanilla sex, Part II

I had suggested to BEG that we go do some of our christmas shopping together. He hesitated at first, saying it wasn't such a good idea, but said he would get his friend's point of view on shopping for our "significant other" together. The next day, he had agreed to going out together, only to cancel in the following hours.

BEG: We made plans to hang out when she got off work. And she has been feeling insecure

Ren: ah I see

It doesn't look like plans. Sounds more like a schedule. He said they haven't spent one night apart when he's been in town since they started dating two months ago.

BEG: She also said she doesn’t want anything for Christmas. I think she really just wants a hug and stuff

Ren: is something wrong then? You said she was feeling insecure about something.

BEG: Oh. She is feeling insecure about her abilities in the bed. I accidentally said something

Ren: oh that was baaaaaad.........what did you doooo???

BEG: I don’t want to talk about it.

Ren: ok

BEG: Lol. Maybe no on shopping today. Julia really wants to hang out. And in a week I’m leaving for a month.

Ren: ok. So I take it we're not going to hang out before you leave.

BEG: Idk... I would like to, but you don’t want to double date?

Oh hellz no.

Ren: hmm I don’t know. We’ll see

BEG: If you were free during the day. Or maybe we can do lunch

Ren: maybe lunch next week. Either Monday/Tuesday, cause I leave on Wednesday.

In the meantime, I was talking to Margot, who also writes a relationship/sex blog. I told her BEG’s dilemma and she suggested I send him the link to one of her blogs.

BEG: man this sucks. The article you sent me looks like soo much fun, but I don’t' know if she would be into any of it

Ren: why not?

BEG: Just her personality. She always wants sex, but that's it, nothing extra

Ren: it seems like she's not putting much effort into it.

BEG: yeah..... I just think she doesn't know how to. She was really only with one guy before for more then a one night thing. And he was very very boring. I don't think she was ever introduced to anything. The only thing she has ever really tried that was her idea was a peppermint in her mouth

Ren: doesn't that hurt?

BEG: Nope. When she comes up I get a cold sensation from the mint. I don't even know she has it in her mouth

Ren: tell her to read it.....

BEG: naw, I just don't think I can do that

Ren: you need to help her come out of her shell. Can’t expect her to become exciting on her own.

BEG: Yeah

[A few hours later, BEG texts me a broken message saying:]

BEG: 1:53pm:  Sheogot me really tuened on and just left for condoms. This sucks!

Ren: 1:54pm: You didn't plan well enough. Always have a box avl.

BEG: 1:59pm: I know! We meant to get some yesterday. We have condoms, but she'll only use spermicide ones. I hope she gets back soon.

Ren: 2:00pm: Haha.

BEG: 2:00pm: This deff is not a laughing matter.

Ren: 2:01pm: But come on! One of you is def to blame here. Could of done it while the other came back from work.

BEG: 2:02pm: Lol. Well, now i'm sitting here waiting for her to come back. Worked up like no other.

Ren: 2:02pm: Sorry. Hoping the finale makes us for it though.

BEG: 2:03pm: I did just say I wanted to be teased but…. I suddenly am not worked up anymore. Man. All that work for nothing. Back on aim?

Ren: 2:07pm: Go for it.

BEG: 2:27pm: Go for what? I don't remember what I asked.

Ren: 2:27pm: Back on aim. I'm on. But I figured she got back.

BEG: 2:41pm: Yup.

Ren: 2:41pm: What the hell are you doing now then?

BEG: 2:43pm: Shopping with Julia.

Ren: 2:44pm: Wait, did you get your fix or are you shopping for the condoms. I'm confused.

BEG: 3:14pm: Fix. Then shopping.

Ren: 3:15pm: Well that was quick. I thought you were an hour man.

BEG: 3:17pm: Just depends

Ren: 3:19pm: Satisfactory, beyond satisfactory or excellent?

BEG: 3:21pm: First one

Ren: 4:27pm: What are you doing?

BEG: 4:29pm: Shopping with Julia. Sorry I couldn't go with you.

Monday, December 21, 2009

He's the victim of vanilla sex

BEG and I have been chatting online and texting more as he's been away on work. It gives us more time to share juicy tips and forbidden secrets. I'm not including every piece of text from our conversation, else it'd turn into a complete XXX blog. No joke.

Ren: so you're coming back to houston, or still out there on the job?

BEG: We are on our way back to houston now


BEG: Of course. Its nice to get home.

Ren: What's the 1st thing you're gonna do once you're back?

BEG: Duh. Think about that. It isn’t a hard thing to answer. Well.... maybe it is kind of "hard"

Ren: you know she'll be avl at that moment you get back?

BEG: Well i guess not right when i get back, but soon after. I hope. Who knows. It’s been over a week maybe this car ride vibrations might do the trick before i get there

[We soon got on the topic of sex positions, experiences and awkward moments when he shared:]

BEG: Yeah... Julia doesnt believe in foreplay... it sucks. She is boring. Nothing but missionary and little to no foreplay. She wont even talk dirty over texts or anything

Ren: I know what you feel.  The bf hardly ever texts, so i feel it's useless to send a naughty msg over. sometimes he will respond when i send him one, but usually it's me initiating the idea

BEG: It really sucks. I have initiated it multiple times. and she does nothing. She likes it but isnt adventurous. I think its why im always a little horny

Ren: Does She talk dirty in bed?

BEG: No. Like i said boring. All the way around. which really sucks because im kinky i feel. Its our only downside

Ren: The bf's pretty naughty, like he has this innocent look, and the minute he started talking dirty, it threw me off guard. i thought i was going to be the one doing the dirty talking, but it was him instead. it took me a while to get used to it

BEG: Lucky you.... Im jealous lets not talk about it anymore

Ren: but i dont know what you consider, or define as kinky in bed. Give me an example.

BEG: Like i normally do.

Ren: LIKE......

BEG: Idk. like how i text? Normally i say this stuff out loud. I think thats why we click on aim but not as well in person because i felt like you were too nice and couldnt handle it

Ren: NO- i meant sex in general. like- there's one thing you'd like to do with her.... different position, situation...... environment

BEG: All of the above. In public. Postions. all of them. I dont care. Just something! Forplay at least

Ren: can you remember the best sex you've ever had?

BEG: It was five years ago

Ren: WHAT was so great about it?

BEG: Idk. it was amazing. she always wanted new things. just good overall. Wish julia would do stuff like that. I wont be able to stand up if we keep talking. lol

Ren: lol

BEG: I wish i was joking though. so christmas gifts. I need to get julia something for Christmas. Jewelry i guess. Im gonna get her the standard small diamond necklas i think. Do you talk about sex with anyone else?

Ren: no. just you. Maybe the necklace will give you kinky sex. "She'll pretty much have to."

BEG: She has a bad knee and hip. Lol. she would if she could but cant. her leg always pops out of place

Ren: ouch, i know what you mean. i have bad knees too- but i manage. he has bad knees too, so it works out lol

BEG: Yeah... but i cant do ANYTHING. :-/

Ren: side sex?

BEG: Tried. Works a bit

to be continued.....

Sunday, December 20, 2009

Naughty Conversations

BEG: I'm going to Abu Dabi for a month

Ren: Congrats! Send me a postcard. I collect them

BEG: I don't even know where Abu Dahbi is or if I'm spelling it right

Ren: United Arab Emirates. Next to Saudi Arabia and Iran.

BEG: Exciting. Now I can say I've been to three continents and the middle East. I better stop shaving now so I fit in. All I know about Abu Dhabi is it's where Garfield always mailed that one girl cat off to.

Ren: LOL you're right, thanks for the laughs. We are competing I see. Three continents here too.

BEG: Lol. Nice.

Ren: When you leaving?

BEG: I want to sleep all day. And then have sex. And then sleep some more.

Ren: You should get as much as you can while you still can!

BEG: I know but I have to work so I can't sleep.

Ren: Then get some of the other one.

BEG: I'm around guys. All I can do is go back to the hotel bathroom lol. How is sex with your bf btw?

Ren: I have a video if you're interested in detail.

BEG: Umm... Really? Do you really have a video already?

Ren: I'll leave it to your imagination.

BEG: Lol. Ok. Wish my gf was more kinky. But that's my only complaint, so it isn't that bad.

I misunderstood him, and thought he was dissing my sex with Sebastian, so I shot back.

Ren: What made you think it was bad?

BEG: I didn't say yours was bad. Just that mine isn't great.

I felt pity for him. At least he was honest. Most guys would brag.

Ren: What makes it not so great then?

BEG: Idk. Just not exciting I guess. Maybe the sex is too good and there's nothing to try to accomplish.

Ren: Or just give it some time and it'll get better. Cause your complaint sounds paradoxical. Make up your mind.

BEG: Guess so.

Ren: But it was everything you hoped for at least, or disappointing in a sense?

BEG: Disappointing I guess. But I really like her so it makes up for it. Glad you're getting everything you want.

Ren: Wow I feel bad. [I really did.]  Do you both finish?

BEG: Yup.

Ren: Then what? It's bland?

BEG: Why are you so worried about this? How's work?

Ren: Cause we kept talking about it. If you want to stop then let me know. Work is picking back up slowly.

BEG: That's good work is picking back up. It's just I get horny when I talk about sex is all. So it's probably best we stop.

Ren: Lol. Ok I'll stop.

BEG: Remember when I made you curse like there's no tomorrow?

Oh crap.

Ren: Oh craaaap

BEG: What?

Ren: Just something embarassing happened.

BEG: Shit. What?

I got beet red

Ren: I was reading your text and my colleague was talking to me at the same time. And I got this smile on my face and he called me out on it.

My colleague got a teasing look on his face and asked what I was writing and the reason for my *smile*. You know- that type of smile

BEG: Lol. Sorry.

Ren: Yeah. Don't do it again. Lol.

BEG: Ok I'll never remind you of the time I made you squeal uncontrollably.


Ren: Shut up.

BEG: Ok. I really will. Sorry. I'm just bored. Been sick all day and I'm stuck in the back seat of a truck now.

Ren: After all this time you still have it in mind? Why?

BEG: Idk. I'll take it you don't lol. I really hope I don't feel sick tomorrow.

I have the crappiest memory. I forget events and moments very easily. It wasn't always like this. 

Ren: I only remember it every so often. Then of course, I have you to remind me when you shouldn't lol.

BEG: Can I ask you something about it though?

Ren: Don't know.

BEG: Do you normally curse like that?

Ren: I'm trying to think and no. Then again, did I really curse that much?

BEG: I think yeah. So it was really good for you then is what I really was wondering.

Ren: I think it was pretty obvious, don't you think?

BEG: True. And that's why I still think of it.

About an hour later.....

Ren: You really suck.

BEG: Why?

Ren: Cause I haven't been able to get it out of my head. I keep trying to concentrate on my work but drifting back to that night.

BEG: Lol. Sorry. At least you have a bf you can meet up with. I'm stuck with guys for a week.

Ren: Yeah, but I won't see him till tomorrow, then he's gone for a week.

BEG: At least you have something to think about. I missed out on what you could do.

Saturday, December 19, 2009

Bare it all men!

Oh what a night.......

To celebrate my 25th birthday upon my return from Europe, my girlfriends decided to give me the ultimate night out- A night that I never plan to forget- that is if I could remember all of it.

I had decided to make plans with my friends for the weekend because Sebastian would be out on vacation in California from Friday till Wednesday. My friend Jennifer (once a colleague) asked me if I wanted to go out to drinks and then to a club on friday night. I know they're into Latin music, and since I'm not, I hesitated to accompany them. She gave me the name of the place where they planned to go, and I did some research online to find out what kind of club it was exactly. I found this link which didn't show anything on the front page. But it didn't take me long to look up on the header and read "Houston Hottest Male Strippers." I quickly texted her back.

Ren: LA BARE is a strip club isn't it????

Jennifer: jajajajajaja

Ren: Well, I'll play dumb and say I didn't know what it was

Jennifer: Lol. Better. So we're going?

Ren: Yeah sure. Where do we meet?

Jennifer: Wooohooo ur casa?

Ren: Sure. I'm in between anyways.

Right after work, I went to Sebastian's to pick him up and take him to the airport. I wished him farewell and began driving back to his place so I could catch up on my shows, when he called me 15 minutes later.

Sebastian: Oh my god I feel so stupid. I screwed up bad Ren.

Ren: What do you mean? What's wrong?

Sebastian: I don't know how I did this, but my flight was yesterday. And there's no refunds so I just lost all my money.

I felt terrible. He had been looking forward to this trip for a long time as he hadn't seen his parents or friends in three years. At the same moment I felt a dilemma coming into play- I wanted to console him, but I didn't want to cancel on my friends (and nooooo, the strippers aren't what enticed me.) I went back to the airport to pick him up and drive him back to his apartment. Once in the car, Sebastian said "I'm sorry. I didn't mess up your plans tonight did I?" I quickly shot him a pity look and said "No sweetie, you didn't. I already made plans with the girls and I can't cancel on them." "Oh ok" he answered.

I stayed with him for about an hour until I headed back to my place to clean up and await to greet my friends. We soon started talking and drinking beer- whereas I went straight for the vodka in my freezer, made myself two "screwdrivers" and the girls requested "taconazos" (beer and tequila in a shot glass.)

Most of us, with the exception of the driver, were already tipsy by the time we left my apartment, and quickly made our way to the club. Since the girls had VIP cards, they requested I be brought in for free as it was my birthday. We took our seat near the front and I was handed out dollar bills by my friends.

I was nervously giggling the entire time. Actually, I remember laughing so hard my head hurt. Most of the night ended up happening very fast, but I do remember being pushed onto the stage and my head rammed into their crotches. One of the guys slowly danced on me and placed my hand on his chest.


As he blew into my ear and neck, I couldn't help but feel a little excited, but not entirely turned on. He kissed me as I placed the dollars in his briefs.

They never got completely nude. They were mainly dancing provocatively in their briefs, or humping the girls that did request lap dances. I wasn't interested in it so I passed up on that.

By closing time, my friends decided to get something to eat at a taco stand nearby and make our way to an after hours club. We made it to the taco stand, ate and mysteriously ran into Jennifer's boyfriend there. My friends think he was spying on her because he didn't acknowledge her greeting. He seemed peeved.

One of the girls wanted to keep drinking and suggested we go back to my apartment to get the rest of the alcohol from my freezer. At this point, I don't remember going up the stairs, or drinking more, but I do remember emptying out my purse to switch bags. And somewhere along the night, I lost my paycheck.

I remember getting into Jennifer's car to drive out to the club, but apparently I fell asleep in the car. At about 4am, Jennifer wakes me to drop me off at my apartment again, and says "We're home!" I ask what happened and she told me that we had to take one of the girls back home because she started work in a few hours that morning, but somewhere along the way, got lost and went around in circles. What should have been one intersection over ending up taking us to the next town. That's how drunk the other girl was.

The next morning, I awoke at 10am feeling queasy and with a bit of heartburn. My stomach started doing funny things and quickly sent me running to the bathroom with a case of the sh*ts. Does anyone else get this after they've drunk??

Soon after, I started looking for my paycheck and couldn't find anywhere. I honestly could not remember where I placed it and had to tell my boss at work on Monday that I'd lost it over the weekend. When asked how I had lost it, I simply stated the obvious "I don't know" while turning to my colleague to admit "I was so drunk I can't remember what the hell I did with it!"

I didn't tell Sebastian what I had done that Friday night as he hadn't asked me where I'd gone with Jennifer. However, during the course of the weekend, he asked me if I'd ever gone to a male strip club and I said yes. Surprised he said "Really...??" as he stripped and slowly started gyrating his hips and groin at me "Yeah. But they keep their briefs on when they dance, so it's no big deal." I answered. "Yeah, the girls do too." he replied.

Friday, December 18, 2009

When in Rome...... (Part IV)

Dec. 3rd was a travelling day to Rome. It was also my 25th birthday.

We woke up in Marseille, France at the family house, got ready with our bags and left to the airport to catch our first plane back to the London hub.

We arrived in London right before lunch time and decided to have lunch at the airport. We patiently awaited for our next flight to take us to Rome, quickly coming to realization that our vacation was coming to an end. Rome would be our last destination.

We arrived in Rome fairly late in the evening, and had a bit of a harder time getting to our hotel. The language barrier was a bit problematic, but most agents and customer service at the train stations managed to speak english and guide us in the right direction. However, we hadn't done any research on how to arrive to the hotel, and I became overwhelmed lugging around my heavy briefcase and not knowing which bus to take. I got the ingenious idea to call the hotel to tell them where I was at (about 7km away) and ask how to get there. The manager told us to take one more metro ride and arrive to the stop where there would be a shuttle bus waiting for us. I was so relieved and Sebastian very happy.

We arrived at the hotel and quickly unpacked our stuff and got into bed. Sebastian had been very hungry and got frustrated when the supermarket right across the street closed as soon as we got there. I told him to eat some of the sausage we had brought back with us from Marseille, and the sandwiches we had been given onboard our flight.

The next day, we woke up to have breakfast downstairs and catch our first glimpse of the weather- gray, dull and hazy. We took the shuttle to the metro station and made our way into central Rome, unfortunately in some rain. We slowly strolled around going from one landmark to the next.

We had dinner at a tiny restaurant where I managed to spit out the phrase "acqua di rubinetto" to specify that I wanted tap water and not bottled water at 3€.

We went back to the hotel and had some more sausage while we watched TV and drank cappuccinos.  I mentioned to Sebastian that I had found it entirely fortunate that we had not been subjected to loud sex by next door guests in any of the hotels. As we were watching TV, we suddenly hear the moans of a man in the next room. I wasn't sure if it was sex or talking, so I immediately put my ear to the wall when Sebastian went into the bathroom (where apparently he was doing the same thing.) It became apparent that it was a SEX session when I heard the sound of skin slapping against two body parts.

There's no way that's masturbating, right?

We quickly heard the moaning grow louder, nearing its grand finale. We never once heard the woman make a peep. We laughed when it was done, telling ourselves that we would compete the following night.

The last day, we took the metro to the Vatican city. What bothered me the most were the incessant amount of peddlers coming up to us to sell crapless roses or offer guided tours of the main momuments. One guy bothered me so much as I was getting my picture taken that Sebastian yelled out "Hey! We're taking a picture here" and motioned for him to move out of the shot.

We arrived at San Pedro's Plaza, the entrance to the Vatican City, to see them setting up the christmas tree. The plaza itself was incredibly big, and Sebastian and I took a break on the steps before we continued to the next place.

We also found Rome to be a lot dirtier and ruder than the other 3 cities we'd visited. It seemed that as further south we headed, the harder it got. I think it has a lot to do with not being able to respond in Italian, even though I can understand a majority of it (I also speak french and spanish fluently)

As we came back to our hotel to pack up our bags, I finally let out a sigh of relief. The trip had come to an end- and a very good one at that. In preparation for our early 8am flight the next day, Sebastian opted for reassurance and commodity to arrive on time at the airport and decided to pay for a shuttle to come pick us up- at the tune of 65€. It hurt me a bit because it was the equivalent to what we'd spent on two nights at the hotel, but it was going to take us too long to do it by bus, metro and train.

That night, as we sat in bed watching the last bit of TV and talking, I remembered how excited I'd been at the beginning of the trip and thinking that maybe 12 days wouldn't be enough. I told Sebastian that after 11 days, I was ready to come home as I was beginning to feel a little homesick, and moreover tired of lugging our luggage from hotel to hotel, unpacking and packing every 3 nights, and hopping on 6 flights and 1 major train ride- plus countless other subways, trains,metros, trams and cars.

We had concluded our trip to Europe- "planes, trains, and automobiles." It was over, but time to come home. Before leaving our hotel room though, the guests next door decided to grace us with a going away gift: Loud laughter and sex at 2:30am, when we had to wake up at 5am.

Sebastian was pissed and made a shitload of noise at 5:00 am when we began getting ready to leave. I just laughed along.

There's a few lessons that that I've learned on this trip-

1) "Free wi-fi" does not mean free wi-fi
2) Pack light
3) Getting lost in Paris is Priceless. There's always an interesting sight to see around each corner.
4) Learn to ask for "tap water" in the different languages. It's free.
5) Carry coins to use the restrooms in Paris and Marseille shopping malls, public restrooms.
6) Wear comfortable shoes.
7) Read the destinations on subways and metros before hopping on.
8) Try a new dish each time
9) Carry cash to leave tips.
10) Pray you don't get a room next to an Italian Couple.

We now return to our regular programing.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Marseille, Marseille..... (Part III)

Our train ride from Paris to Marseille was very calm and relaxed. We rode on the TGV which took 3.5 hours. We had bought some snacks and sandwiches at a bakery in Paris because the meals were at least 8€ on the train. This was also Sebastian's first train ride, which he mostly spent reading, while I listened to music and tried to do our "bookkeeping." However, I fibbed during the trip to Paris, and had a very hard time keeping track of our money, and decided I didn't want to complete it until I saw my statement back at home.

I was fairly excited about this stop because I would be visiting my friends and family. Sebastian had admitted to me that he was a bit bummed out about having to stop at family's, and I told him I understood (I'd be bummed out too if I had to stop by someone's family in a completely different country and not know the language) but I hadn't seen them in almost 3 years, and had been looking forward to it for a while.

We arrived at the station where my brother picked us up. We went to his mother's house where I greeted my friend Ingrid, sister Samantha and her mother Marie. We had a nice dinner and caught up on some current events. My brother speaks english from what he has learned on shows and school, so he was able to talk with Sebastian. My sister is only a beginning english speaker, so spoke very slowly to him.

We went to sleep tired that night, with plans to visit Marseille the next afternoon.

We awoke to an empty house and had breakfast in the computer room as we took turns taking showers. My brother came to pick us up around 1pm, and took us to Palais Longchamps to walk around the garden before lunch.

We grabbed some kebabs and drove up to the Cathedral Notre Dame de la Garde which overlooks all of Marseille. It was very windy and cold, to the point of making our eyes water.

That afternoon, we went to see my brother's friends (his ex-gf Nana and his best friend who just had a baby) and spend time with them. Sebastian and the guys went off into the kitchen to smoke, while Nana and I talked about everything that'd been going- relationships, work, health, school, travel and family. She had come to visit us twice since 1999 when she was dating my brother. We reconnected fairly well when I came back to France during '06-'07.

Later that night, we went to the store to do some grocery shopping at the supermarket for that evening's soirée. While I was trying to pick out stuff (and evidently taking too much time) my brother got frustrated and managed to make me swell up with emotions and cry. My friend Ingrid quickly saw me upset, but I couldn't bear to tell her that I was too sensitive to my brother's comments.  Sebastian didn't know what was going on either, but I kept it to myself until that night when we went to bed.

That night, a few people I had met on my previous visit came to hang out at the house. We played games and mainly just talked and joked around. Most of the girls and non english speakers were in the room with me, while the guys and english speakers were in the other room playing poker. Sebastian managed to get along quite well with the guys. The guys thought him a few phrases such as "Ma boisson préferée est le pastis" as anise resembles licorice, which he loves.

The last night before our flight, we went to a fondue house where Sebastian and I quickly agreed that it was "fun don't." The smell of cheese overtook us as soon as we stepped inside. We sat at a table and waited for our different pots of cheese and bread. That was it. That's all there is to fondue: bits of bread, dipped in melted cheese. My brother joked around saying we shouldn't wear the same coats and jacket on the plane the next day to avoid hearing comments like "Ah, ces français puent!" (these french people stink)

The next morning was my 25th birthday. Sebastian and I had stayed awake past midnight the night before packing our bags and talking about our visit to Marseille. He admitted that he had had a lot of fun and been surprised about the turnout and enjoyed spending time with my family and friends. He said he had been relieved that a few of them spoke english.

The next morning, while going through my notes on my Ipod Touch, I came across the following message:

Hi bright eyes! *kiss*
.___. .___.
./@ \. ./@ \.
\___/ \___/ .

You make my day brighter.

It was one of the sweetest messages he had ever sent me.

Overall, I enjoyed being in Marseille, and I consider it to be the most beautiful stop. I could have stayed up on that hilltop at the church for hours if it wasn't for our limited time.

Next blog- andiamo a Roma!

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Ooh la la.... Paris. (Part II)

Heureusement que l'un de nous parlait français, sinon, ça aurait été une expérience de merde pour nous deux.

We arrived at CDG airport in Paris in the early evening and took a train all the way to La Gare de L'Est where our hotel was located. Unfortunately, our train car was filled with the pungent smell of dog urine: not the way to welcome a foreigner into Paris. Musicians got onboard and played the accordion and violin and entertained us for a while until they moved onto the following car.

Once at the hotel lobby, the manager informed me that they were at maximum capacity and had upgraded us to an Executive Suite on the sixth floor.

When Sebastian heard the word "suite" his ears perked up and he asked me to confirm. We rode up the elevator to find ourselves in the nicest suite either one of us had ever been in. Face to face with a living room with refrigerator, full bathroom, closets, and a separate bedroom, we jumped with joy and ran to the window to see what kind of view we had.

There in the distance stood our beloved Tour Eiffel.

To our right, the Basilique du Sacré Coeur stood on a hill, quietly illuminated.

We decided to go out to dinner to a restaurant across the street where I ordered for the both of us. We came back to our hotel and went to sleep, ready to start our journée the following day.

We decided to walk instead of riding the metro all day as we had done previously in London. We walked all over the city to the Louvre, Notre Dame and the Eiffel Tower. We walked so much our feet didn't hurt anymore.

We had dinner at different restaurants every meal, all the time excited about the choice in foods and environment we would come across. A very useful tip I learned a few years back was to learn how to ask for tap water in France. Every waiter will try to offer you "still or sparkling" water without the customer realizing that they are selling you a bottle of water. "Un carafe d'eau" is free tap water in a used but clean bottle.

We went to visit the Louvre and because I was still under 25 and travelling with my European Union Passport, managed to get in for free while Sebastian paid 9€ for his ticket.

We strolled around, looking at the statues and paintings, and came face-to-face with La Joconde- the Mona Lisa, hanging alone on a wall about 20'x20' (so that more people can view her at once.)

Afterwards, we walked through the Tuileries Garden and made our way to the Eiffel Tower, following the path of the Seine river. We walked for so long we saw the light show repeatedly in the distance.


Overall, our visit to Paris was very relaxing and enjoyable. I think it had a lot to do with being able to speak the language and not get taken like an ass. We walked around a lot, and I think that was my favorite part of hanging out with Sebastian. We got to talk and joke around and please our tummies with delicious crêpes along the way.

Next blog:

Tous à bord! Départ pour Marseille!