I messed up. But I have a good reason why. Let's attempt to start from the beginning.
My dad came over this weekend from California to visit the family. I ended up staying at my parent's home on Friday and Saturday because that's what I normally do when my dad comes into town. Remember that he lives and runs his business in California, but is still married to my mother. We're still a family, just.... divided across this continent.
Anywho, around Thursday last week, I noticed that I had skipped two birth control pills in a row on my 2nd week. I use my iPod Touch as my alarm, but since I reset it, the volume on it has been acting out and doesn't always make a sound. Granted the alarm goes off, as I see it on my screen- it just doesn't make the sound effect I need it to to remind me to take that pill at 9 pm every night.
So ladies, you must know that if you miss 2 pills in rows 1 and 2, you are supposed to take them right away, skip a day then take the remaining 2 to put you back on track, AND use a backup method for 1 week after. So I told Sebastian about this, and he took note and said "No worries, we still have condoms."
Fast forward to last night when I drop my dad off at the airport and we're all saying good bye. I had decided I would spend the night at Sebastian's because his apartment is just around the corner. He's still at work when I get there, so I clean up the kitchen, do the dishes and make myself a margarita. Everything is fine. I have another drink, and about 30 minutes later or so, Sebastian calls to see what I'm up to, and it's obvious then that I'm completely drunk. I bust into a furry of giggles and he laughs too and says he'll be home soon.
About 20 minutes later, he enters the apartment with a small bouquet of roses.(To be discussed in tomorrow's blog)
We proceed to take the kissing to the bedroom where he playfully pushes me on the bed, a little harder than I expected and I end up ramming my head on the wall as I lean back. A loud THUD leaves Sebastian with a big GASP look on his face. "Are you okay??" he asks. "Yeah, I don't feel a thing!" and we bust into a frenzy of laughter.
We then [CENSORED.....CENSORED.....CENSORED], and come back into the living room a while later. He pours himself the leftover mix and I hear my "no babies" alarm- my 9pm reminder for my birth control. I stumble into the kitchen and grab my packet out of my purse. That's when Sebastian turns around to me and says "Hey- weren't we supposed to use protection because of your missed pills last week?"
"[**EXPLICIT***]!!!!! Oh nooooooooo!!!" I scream out.
"Yeah...... yeah....... nice. So what now? Plan B?" he adds
"Why is it that when I was younger, I never missed a pill, but now that I'm older and supposedly more responsible, I have problems remembering to take them???! CRAP!!" I said.
"I think, subconsciously, you want a baby." he said
Crap. Is that what it meant? But I know I'm not ready for a baby. I know I don't want one right now. Could it be because I see him as an ideal father figure that I'm willing to accept whatever happens??
"You want this baby don't you??" I confronted him
"I mean, it wouldn't be the worst thing to happen. It would just speed things up" he said."But I'm not ready for a baby. We're not ready for a baby" he concluded.
"Yeah, that's what I thought." I replied.
"So plan B?" he asked.
"Yeah..... I'll do it tomorrow after work"